Cody Tucker|Lansing State Journal
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EAST LANSING – Pulling green and white tape off his left wrist after a grueling Tuesday night practice, Chris Frey Jr. rolled up his sleeve to expose an arm full of tattoos.
Two bright red roses are inked just above his left wrist.
A poem lines the outside of his forearm.
“Goodbyes are not forever, goodbyes are not the end; they simply mean I’ll miss you until we meet again.”
The words “I love you” are also inscribed onhis skin. It’s in her handwriting:Kaye Smith,his grandmother,who unexpectedly died from a blood clot in a Columbus, Ohio, hospital bed the morningof June 17.
A pocket watch tattooed on the inside of Frey'sleft forearm is set to 6:56.
“It was the hardest moment of my life,” Michigan State’s senior linebacker and captain said, fighting back tears inside the indoor practice facility.
His other tribute to his grandmother was on the field, during the third quarter of last Saturday’s opening 35-10 win over Bowling Green.
Frey blew around the Falcons’ right tackle and leaped at the ankles of the quarterback with both arms extended. He dropped James Morgan near the goal line before leaping to his feet, raising both arms above his head and pointing into the sky as teammates hugged and embraced him.
“I came off the ball and that was the first thought that went through my mind: ‘I’m getting a sack here, and this one is for you,’” he said. “I just knew she was there. I came over to the sideline and I took a knee.
“I had tears in my eyes.”
A group of fans in section 26 did, too.
Sitting at the opposite end of the stadium, Brea Frey, Frey’s mother and Kaye Smith's daughter, knew immediately whohe was honoring.
“I’d like to think that I am the strongest person I know, but the last few months have been so hard that I just cried,” she said. “My other two children were in tears and even my husband. I got a lot of hugs.”
The last time the family was in Spartan Stadium, it was all smiles.
Back on April 1, moments after the spring game concluded, 72 close friends and family came down to the 50-yard line for a family photo. Instead of saying “cheese,” the crowd erupted with two words: “I do!”
Chris Frey Jr., still wearing his grass-stained uniform and sporting a brown ponytail with a face full of eye black, got down on one knee and extended a ring in the direction of longtime girlfriend, Montana Henry. Shock, tears and hugs followed.
One person was missing.
“Grandma wasn’t there on that day,” Henry said over the phone from her home in Columbus. “She wasn’t feeling well. She was pretty much the only family member not able to be there. A couple months later, we had to come say goodbye to her.”
After Frey's sack last Saturday, Henry said, she looked right at her future mother-in-law.
“We knew what it was about,” she said. “We both started crying. It was a surreal momentand obviously his first big play this season. She definitely would be proud.”
After Smith’s death, each family member received a necklace, containing her ashes. Each Saturday this season, Henry will wear Frey’s.
“It’s so she is sitting in the stands cheering him on,” Henry said.
A BEAUTIFUL SOUL
Kaye Smith was known for her big personality.
“She was the most loving, caring person you will ever meet in your life,” said Frey, taking a deep breath to collect his thoughts.
“She was crazy, I’ll tell you that.”
When she wasn’t making up her own words, she was boasting about her six grandchildren. Although she never fully wrapped her head around the game of football, she knew that, when Frey signed with MSU, all her Ohio State memorabilia was bound for a garbage truck. Her new motif consisted of Spartan flags, decorations and a whole new, mostly green wardrobe.
She was always there to lend an ear or a bit of advice, and she frequented restaurants and retail shops in Grove City, spreading the word about her grandson’s latest gridiron glories. She gloated about the Rose Bowl, Cotton Bowl and College Football Playoff. Freywas on those teams.
She was the matriarch of the family, the glue that held them all together.
“She’s the one who made us as close as we are with siblings, cousins and aunts,” Brea Frey said about her mother. “We had lots of family gatherings because of her.”
She was also known for her kindness and empathy.
Brea Frey recalls a time when a teenager knocked on the door of her parent’s rural home asking for $20 because he ran out of gas. Without even seeing a car or questioning the man, Smith handed him the money. He claimed hewould return in the following days to pay her back.
He never did.
“A couple of days later, I told her, ‘I don’t think he’s coming back, mom,’” Brea Frey laughed. “She just said, ‘He must’ve needed it more than I did.’”
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Chris Frey Jr., his two siblings and his cousins spent nearly every day at their grandparent’s home. They would eat breakfast there, catch the school bus, come back and do homework before Brea or Chris Frey Sr. came to pick them up in the evening.
“She was always there for us,” hesaid. “Honestly, for us and my cousins, she was like a second mother figure in our life. We leaned on her for everything. We loved that about her."
SUDDEN SADNESS
Frey didn't thinkmuch about that phone call, not at first.
It was from his dad, Chris Frey Sr., who was coming up to East Lansing to spend the weekend with him and his teammates. The younger Frey, who was at the Drew Stanton golf outing, answered and told his dad that he wanted to go out that night.
Chris Frey Sr. wasn’t calling to make a game plan for the night. He had bad news.
“I walked away from everyone, sat down and he told me. Honestly, I cried right there,” Frey said. “It was tough. My dad took me home (to Columbus), and I was fighting tears the entire way.”
Chris Frey Sr. said he waited until he was roughly an hour outside of East Lansing to make the call. He didn’t want to ruin his son’s entire afternoon.
His own grandfather had been in an automobile accident when he was a child,and he wasn’t prepared for what he witnessed in that hospital room. He didn’t want the same for his son.
On the four-hour drive back to Columbus,“we talked quite a bit about what he was going to see and stuff like that,” Frey Sr. said. “I told him to remember her the way she was, not the way you are going to see her.”
Henry had been attending a wedding butrushedto her fiancee's side.
“It was so very sudden,” Henry said. “That was the hard part. We went in to say our goodbyes and what stuck with me was he just sat there and said he wished he had more time with her. He wished she was going to be there for his senior year and our wedding. He said he will always have moments that he wishes she was there for.”
At 6:56 a.m., Freysaid goodbye.
“I think it was huge for me to be able to be there and see her,” he saidwith tears welling up in his eyes. “It was a loving moment, honestly.”
Frey was away from his teammates for more than a week. For the guy who is affectionately known as the “Spartan Psycho,”it seemed like an eternity.
He had coach Mark Dantonio's blessingto take all the time he needed. But he was a leader, and, in his mind, his leadership was in question.
He returned to East Lansing more motivated than ever.
Then, another phone call came. His great aunt Lorna Flaherty had died suddenly. He was back in Ohio for another week.
“It’s been tough on him,” Brea Frey said. “But, he’s a tough kid.”
A NEW BEGINNING
This summer, Frey cut his long hair, donating 14-inches to cancer patients. Agood deed anda symbol of a new beginning.
Over the past year-and-a-half, MSU had gone fromthe College Football Playoffs to a forgettable 3-9 record. The off-season headlines that followed came with major black marks for the program.
“It’s been a crazy ride,” he said. “It’s been pretty up and down for the past year, but I am working through it.”
Wiping sweat off his forehead Tuesday, a smile creased his face.
He was thinking about his sack again. He hopes it's the first of many.
“I actually had been planning that ever since (she died),” Frey said. “My first sack would be dedicated to her. It was just a really exciting moment for meand just huge for me to be able to celebrate her like that.”
After the game, he posted a note to Twitter with a highlight of his sack.
“This one was for you Mawmaw," it said."I miss you every day. Today I missed you a little more.”
Contact Cody Tucker at (517) 377-1070 or cjtucker@lsj.com and follow him on Twitter @CodyTucker_LSJ.
